When does the healing begin?

First, I am the admin for both our website and forum. When ever you see the logo, it is me. A little about that logo. My wife shot it as I was walking out of a castle, here in Omaha, Ne. My daughter had an amazing vision of having her reception dinner there. After discovering the price, we opted out, but found a place that was much more reasonable and it had more space for the money.

I feel as though I can open up here, as opposed to the blog. So I want to start off in this area because we are getting more traffic on this topic than others. Obviously, I want others to comment on their experience with this topic, if they feel comfortable doing it. I have shared plenty over the years about my experience with this subject, coming from a husband whose wife committed Adultery.

When did the healing finally begin with me? It was many years later, as I had to get past the angry, humiliation and the overall feelings of betrayal. When could I begin to trust this person again? All the thoughts associated with the loss of someone, since this was the person you had committed to spend the rest of your life with and now that person was gone, in a way. I wanted to be close to her as before, but all I thought about was the act of sex, she had with another. If I was to just forget it too quickly, just for the sake of getting on with life, what would that say about my character? A lot had to be worked through and only time allows you to it the right way. Still, I wanted to reconcile and get the past behind me as quickly as possible, since the pain was becoming unbearable. But time doesn't work as fast as we want it to, does it?

The healing begins for everyone different, whether you have decided to reconcile with your spouse or not. It starts for a lot of us when we decide to forgive the other person and ourselves. You may want to forgive yourself, if you believe you may have been irresponsible with taking care of business at home, as I was. I neglected, when I should have been involved. Eventually, time went by and with it, the healing. It is still day to day, but now I make a conscience effort to work at it.